Day 361: Norm Macdonald Made Himself Laugh

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I don’t like writing obituaries and tributes. For starters, I’m no good at it. Nobody should have to be good at it. In a perfect world, it would never be necessary. Nothing I’m… Continue reading

Day 360: Bye Weeks Are For Suckers [Beer League Quarterfinals Preview]

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I’d call it an embarrassment of riches because after all, it really is. But I fucking hate the first round bye week. As nice as it feels to finish the regular season on… Continue reading

Day 359: Because Ninja Rap Still Slaps [Top 5 Top 5 Sunday]

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Well, this feels weird. Today is the last traditional Top 5 Top 5 Sunday. Next Sunday is my wedding anniversary, so I’m going to write lists about how much I love my wife,… Continue reading

Day 358: I Forgot The Title [Saturday Haikus]

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Don’t know what to writeWoke up in the wrong headspaceBut I’ll try my best We spent all morningWading through bureaucracy And wordy jargon Finally, we pickedBenefits that worked for usAnd the website crashed… Continue reading

Day 357: I’d Rather Not Be Tricked Into Eating Gum [Friday Thought W/ TeeCoZee]

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Good Moleman. Everyone has a fear of something. Not everyone. Diet. Where?!? Where?!? Ahhh!!!! It’s Friday, September 10th, 20Two1. The weather in Long Island City is 70˚ & Pantone 14-4123 & somewhere, somebody… Continue reading

Day 356: 388 Words About Homeward Bound

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Oh look, here I am again tapping my readers for subjects. Finding things to write for 369 straight days is hard! I’m not running out of ideas, it’s just that your ideas are… Continue reading

Day 355: 432 Words About Raven [Wrasslin’ For Lunch]

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Rejoice! I finally figured out what to call “those pieces where I ask somebody to come up with a subject for me”. From now on, it’ll be referred to as Word Count Wednesdays.… Continue reading

Day 354: Ad Nauseous – Like A Pawn Shop But Better

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In these unprecedented times, we like to use terms like “unprecedented”. We also use fear-mongering slang like, “uncertain”, “trying” and “bread maker”. We get it. Things suck right now. You lost your job… Continue reading

Day 353: Top 5 Screams From Last Week

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Screams. Everyone does em. I scream, you scream, we scream. It’s a thing we do. Some more than others, but we all do it. They vary in range, size, volume, length, gut-feel, reasoning… Continue reading

Day 352: Because I Got Conned Into Playing Fantasy Football [Top 5 Top 5 Sunday]

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I haven’t paid attention to football in years. You know this, because every September, I never stop shutting the fuck up about it. Like being above football makes me a better person. I… Continue reading