Category Archive: Top 5

Top 5 Jobs That Should Be Replaced By Robots

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It’s 2016. Do you know where your robots are? If you said “at work”, then you’re probably misinformed and an idiot that eats butt for dinner. We live in very convenient times. I… Continue reading

Top 5 Ill-Advised Breakfast Cereals

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These cereals put the “rekt” in breakfast!

Top 5 Fantasy Sleepers Of 2016

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I’m really good at Fantasy Baseball. I’ve got all numbers. In all of the leagues that mattered, I finished 2nd place. I’m like the Buffalo Bills of Baseball. That is if the Buffalo… Continue reading

The Top 5 Things I’d Rather Watch Than The YES Network

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I hope you understand that I’m going to be spewing out Yankees Hate® all summer long and it’s a fact that you should probably get used to. It’s all I know how to… Continue reading

I’d Rather Call It Friday Birthday Thoughts With TeeCoZee The Late Edition 400th Post Extravaganza

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Good Moleman to you. It’s Saturday, March 21, Nineteen Eighty Seven. The weather in Brooklyn is 48˚ & raining and somewhere, some weird kid is getting all borned and stuff. He’s going to… Continue reading

Top 5 Reasons I’d Rather Be Making Top 5 Lists [Top 5 Thoughts Of 2014 With Tee “Top 5” CoZee]

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Top 5 Ways To Start The Friday Thoughts 5) Good Afternoon 4) It’s Friday, January 2, Two Thousand and Fifteen 3) The weather in Brooklyn is 42˚ and partly cloudy 2) Somewhere, somebody… Continue reading

Mike Carp Didn’t Make My Top 5 Top 5 Lists Of The Week

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5) Top 5 Reasons Why Your Shitty Apartment Is Better Than Citi Field 5) You can go to the bodega and buy a beer for a dollar 4) There’s no free sauerkraut to… Continue reading

Mike Trout Didn’t Make My Top 5 Top 5 Lists Of The Week

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There’s nothing better than a list to efficiently express your opinion on a matter. Wait, there is something better. More lists! So every week, I’m going to make up a bunch of arbitrary… Continue reading

The Top 5 Reasons Why I’m Not Ready For Football

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I’ve made this opening paragraph a million times before. You can taste it in the air. You can smell the rubbery scent of freshly picked backpacks. Blah blah fuckity blah. Fall is coming.… Continue reading

The Top 5 Things That I Should Avoid Doing On My Next Date

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Some asshole once told me to write about what scares me. In turn, I wrote an epic essay on my own shadow and nobody read it. That’s the last time I’ll take advice… Continue reading