Category Archive: Football For Supper

Gary Kubiak And The Infinite Kertwang [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2013 Week 7]

by

If I wanted to get punched in the face, I would go to the Double Down Saloon sporting an accordion and start spraying people in the face with Axe®, while playing a song… Continue reading

SPOILER: The Giants Lost [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2013 Week 6]

by

Around this time in October, we all kind of forget that it’s Breast Cancer® Awareness Month. I was almost hoping that a team would roll out one day with pink uniforms. The Seahawks… Continue reading

Matt Schaub Was Who We Thought He Was [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2013 Week 5]

by

The sports gods were having an orgy last Sunday. Whoever thought it was a good idea to air 14 straight hours of Pro Football was a sick genius. And to sprinkle 2 quality… Continue reading

Introducing: Buttfumble 2.0 [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2013 Week 4]

by

This is supposed to be the time of year that I fall into that Golden Zone. Bye weeks are starting and I’ve reached the level where I can watch 9 hours of football… Continue reading

Eli Manuel Plays The Boos [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2013 Week 3]

by

Monday night, CyboManning decimated the Oakland Raiders. The only surprising fact about this is that they scheduled the Broncos and Raiders to play Monday Night Football. Were they afraid of competing with Breaking… Continue reading

The Art Of Falling Down And Going Boom [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2013 Week 2]

by

It was a long and tumultuous summer, there’s no denying that. An air conditioning deficiency was so dramatic that even my skin got armpit stains. You can’t change your skin, that’s unfortunately not… Continue reading

The Top 5 Reasons Why I’m Not Ready For Football

by

I’ve made this opening paragraph a million times before. You can taste it in the air. You can smell the rubbery scent of freshly picked backpacks. Blah blah fuckity blah. Fall is coming.… Continue reading

Operation Not Good [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2012 Week 13]

by

This was supposed to be fun and exciting and whatnot. With only a month left before the playoffs, week 13 showed a lot of promising slobberknockers between division rivals. But that would have… Continue reading

Can We Just Call Him Butt Sanchez? [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2012 Week 12]

by

This season has been flying by quicker than the Eagle’s winning streak. The bye weeks are already over, which means that I have to work extra hard to pass information onto you. And… Continue reading

The Sloppy Revenge Of The Scab QB™ [TeeCoZee’s NFL Roundup 2012 Week 11]

by

If you’re a quarterback in the NFL and your name isn’t Manning, chances are you are also a human being. The problem with being a human being is that you urinate constantly get… Continue reading