Day 365: The Year In Haiku

Day Three Sixty-Five
It’s a landfill of content
But which ones stood out?

My wife is the best
I remember Jolt Cola
And get tinnitus

I drive through Midtown
And celebrate the Good News
While musing on chance

I eat some dog food
And I decide to hydrate
While getting goosebumps

Take in the silence
And call it a cry for help
And ride the train home

I make excuses
Zach finishes his project
And I drink a Squirt

Some innuendo
And a guy installed some lights
While the Dodgers won

You’re the man now dog
And my Mom had a birthday
With Top Five Top Fives

Willy looks outside
We decorate for Christmas
And drink Arctic Sun

I yell at Maskholes
While I write about Ramen
And drinking cold beer

This dude fucks, for sure
Survivor Series sucked ass
Watch waterbed ads

I watch the rain race
And I embrace December
While dressing backwards

I watch a good flick
And fall in love with NXT
But pears fucking suck

It’s spelled, “Bubes”, dummy.
I’m stuck in line at the store
And write Phantom Songs

I hate dirty snow
But I fucking love Christmas
And so do the wolves

My cat’s a hipster
I look back at the year past
It could’ve been dope

Smoke-Free for 5 years
We put our lives in boxes
Fuck Quesadillas

I get a tooth ache
And trade in a parking lot
For a balcony

My uncle’s old desk
Helps me write about Shawarma
And we moved to Queens

I crunch in the snow
While I try a shitty Coke
And I look at butts

Lou wore his rain hat
And I find a new grocer
Some days be like that

It’s short and stupid
But I got vaccinated
And watched some people

I bemoan black pants
And dream about Al Kaline
While ranking chickens

Listening to sleep
I could have used a role model
Or just a good day

There’s farty pyros
And dudes working on the tracks
So I cut my hair

Think of my island
And I have mushroom flashbacks
Also a birthday

A balcony cat
And a shitty saturday
It’s a long stretch, man

Raw is still shitty
And my Dad has retired
So I watch baseball

Love Astoria
Love winning a lottery
Hate shitty commutes

A nice and warm bed
I was afraid of scarecrows
And pondered a ton

Willy lived 9 years
And I forgot yesterday
While watching in awe

I can’t eat a steak
I can complain about ads
I can write haikus

The train is empty
I write my favorite story
And get some dank seats

Still not quite Summer
While Nicole’s house falls apart
While I visit home

I had a nightmare
I can’t hide my annoyance
Maple needs to clean

This dude had a day
I become optimistic
And push carts downhill

I drink some Limca
And some wrestlers are released
Rainchecks are stupid

I observe people
Benny rolls the burritos
And my Dad visits

I hit rock bottom
And I hate gimmick matches
And I test Will’s brain

I get my nails done
And I have some good problems
But Vince has bad ones

It’s hot as hell, man
I leave the ballgame early
And write about it

Back to a column
I remember darker times
The rain keeps falling

Asleep at a flick
I write out of an attack
And play Tony Hawk

I paint my toe nails
Discover Tudor City
And have a weird dream

I look at a picture
And remember our first date
It was a good week

Wrestling got real weird
Some teens ate elephant ears
But is it a bank?

Crush Davis is gone
I couldn’t write on corn dogs
Dolls are gonna fight

Think about buckets
And I look across the street
Eating some hot dogs

An island reset
And a chicken laying eggs
Wrestling is the best

It doesn’t have to
Make even a lick of sense
It just has to peel

I screamed a whole lot
And accidentally ate gum
What about Raven?

My first concussion
And goodbye to my hero
I’m on the home stretch

What I have to show
Is 52 weeks of words
And time to write more

– TeeCoZee