Day 142: Because Robocop Doesn’t Need A Number To Be Cool [Top 5 Top 5 Sunday]

I know I say it a lot, but wow that was a long week. It snowed twice. I can’t remember the last time that’s ever happened here. There’s something about major weather events that really defines a week, but when it happens twice, the week drags really long in your short term memory. The last snow was even almost melted. That’s how long this week has been. And on top of all that, we still have a Super Bowl left to pretend to be excited about. This week will never end. So while we patiently wait, here’s some lists for no reason:

5) Top 5 Things To Do When It Snows

5) Crunch my feet in it
4) Take pictures of it
3) Complain about it
2) Stare at it
1) Feel nostalgic

Since it snows so rarely in New York, it’s become a life event. We always remember the one good snow we get every few years. Seeing the flakes fall is an instant reminiscing mechanism. Whether it be of gleeful childhood times, emo teenage contemplating or smoking a bowl in the middle of Fulton Street just because you could get away with it, snow always takes you back.

4) Top 5 Robots

5) Hal 900
4) Johnny 5
3) Rick Deckard
2) Guzlootron 2000
1) Robocop

I was going to make it a list of top robots that don’t have numbers in their name, but my options were wearing thin. Having a number on a robot is such a common Sci-Fi trait and I don’t fully understand why. I guess in the olden times, people weren’t familiar with upgrading computers and software, so a present version number was a big fucking deal. And for a while, that’s how it worked in the real world. The upgrade from Windows 98 from 95 was a big deal. But after a while, companies assumed that consumers were sick of seeing the numbers grow and just started slapping arbitrary names on them. If Apple were to buy out Skynet, you bet your ass the next product would be the T-1000 Redwood.

3) Top 5 Super Bowl Memories

5) Being angry about the Patriots winning
4) The blackout
3) The Philly Special
2) John Elway finally getting his due
1) Laying on the living room floor, in my inflatable Chargers helmet, slowly and methodically banging my head backwards, knowing that I’m not going to be able to show my face at school tomorrow, knowing for the first time to feel truly and utterly hopeless and depressed at the ripe age of 7.

Nope, I have no pent up resentment towards the Chargers shitting the bed in Super Bowl XXIX. Why would you ever think that?!!

2) Top 5 “Big Game” Foods

5) Buffalo wings
4) Hot dogs
3) Dip
2) Dip
1) Dip

I don’t need a meal for the game. I just need a spread of dips and an assortment of objects to carry said dips. I’ll even eat hummus if if push came to shove. As long as it’s got a disposable consistency and the edible utensil is salty or carroty, I’ll be dippin’ it. You just don’t have to think about dips. You can just snack for the duration of the game and never once be distracted. I once went to a party that had over 30 dips and nothing else. It was fucking glorious. I was dipping all night and still caught all of the sportstacular action. If your Big Game Soirée doesn’t have more than 3 dips, I’m fuckin dipping, noamsain?

1) Top 5 New Pictures In My Camera Roll






I’m starting to wonder whether or not the lady is actually sleeping or if she’s just practicing something from the book. Either way, good for her!

Have a sleepy week, everybody!

– TeeCoZee