Day 046: You Don’t Need To Doomscroll. You Need Joe Pera.

You casted your vote. Good job. Pat yourself on the back. Now scratch it a little. You need those small comforts. Now what? You can feel a pressure in your chest. The walls are closing in. The election results won’t be in for hours. You know some of your family members voted for Lord Voldemort. Your little cousin wrote in Kanye West. An overwhelming dread is coming upon you. Your grocery store is boarding up. Your favorite show was cancelled. You didn’t like Tiger King. Everything’s wrong in the universe. It’s okay. You’re okay. There is nothing else you can do at this point. You did well. Or at least you did the bare minimum. That still counts. All you can do is wait.

But what can you do to pass the time?

I would highly recommend staying away from social media. But if you are reading this, that would mean that you did not stay away from social media. Oh well. Maybe just keep scrolling until you see the picture of a cute cat or a rockin’ car. The news will be there waiting for you when you’re ready. Water doesn’t boil unless you step away from it. Let the news percolate while you ignore it. Much like a turkey or a giant venison roast. The more often you open the oven to poke and prod, the more unevenly it will cook. Read the news when the timer goes off. That way, it won’t be undercooked when it’s time for you to consume it. That’s some tasty news.

I know it’s hard. I too like to watch the refresh circle dance from time to time. It’s kind of mesmerizing. But just imagine that there’s a place out there where none of this matters. It’s filled with simple people that enjoy the little things. Life moves too slow up there for them to get caught up in the troubles of the modern world. You’d be surprised to know that this place is real. It’s called Marquette, Michigan. You’ve probably seen it on a map or maybe in a documentary on Lake Superior that your uncle thought you would really like.

Their favorite resident is Joe Pera. He has his own television show. It’s called, “Joe Pera Talks With You”. In it, he talks with you. That’s the show. He’s a high school choir teacher that loves collecting ores. He loves taking autumn drives and getting breakfast at the diner. He goes out of his way to help all of his friends and they always repay the favor. His new neighbors are going through marital problems. He just discovered this band called, “The Who”, and he can’t wait to tell you all about them. He grows beans in his spare time and is known to make recreations of the 2001 film, “Rat Race”. In the only full episode I could find on Youtube, Joe cannot sleep and neither can you. I think it’s very fitting for how we’re feeling today.

If you want to know more about Joe Pera, Adult Swim most likely has episodes on demand through your cable provider. If you want to know more about Marquette, you can go to your local library.

Stay sane. Stay safe. We’ll get through this.

– TeeCoZee