Questions To Ask Yourself While Playing Contra

– If painkillers were never invented, would the whole world huff paint?
– Will the future of sports entail running around hunting each other in bulletproof jumpsuits?
– Will it be the new Ping-Pong or a sadistic version of Cricket?
– Where do bullet casings go? There has to be a lot of them littering the earth. Do they decompose?
– If you kill a fly, does God send 2 more flies to make up for the loss?
– If you kill those two flies, does he resort to bees?
– Does Antarctica even exist?
– Do they have a nuclear program?
– If a room is closed off without any person being inside of it, would dust form?
– Would products from the 60’s have brighter colors if the sun didn’t exit?
– Do people shave their noses if they have really bad growth, or are not accustomed to plucking?
– Do they even make razors for noses?
– Would they do it if there was more demand?
– What does any of this have to do with Contra?

Exactly.

See? It’s good to ask questions sometimes.

-TeeCoZee?